Doulas and Nannies

I had the day off today, my usual Friday off the week after being on call for the weekend.  I didn’t set my alarm last night because I was sure I’d wake up in plenty of time to make it to my hair cut appointment at 10:45.  And that’s how I ended up being 5 minutes late this morning.  I had no idea I had it in me to sleep until after 10am!  And now, 12 hours later, I’m just about ready for bed again, so I guess I really needed the sleep.

After lunch I met with my doula for our first prenatal appointment.  We started with a list of about 15 things that could possibly happen during delivery, and she asked me how I felt about each of them (everything from being offered narcotic pain meds to early cord clamping to timing of erythromycin eye drops).  And this is where I became convinced that I’d hired the right woman for the job, I love that she’s detail oriented and open minded.  I’m sure others have you have noticed this, that just like many in the medical profession can be closed minded and sure that their way is the only way, I’ve found that those in what could be loosely called the “alternative medicine” field are often just as narrow minded in their view points.  But Alex, my doula, is open to both sides of every issue.  And in the instances where I didn’t agree with her, she presented her side of things, and if I still didn’t agree, she respected my opinion and moved on.  The end result is we have a one page birth plan that has topics listed on the left, with a brief description next to it.  For example:

PAIN MEDS  If I need pain medication, I will ask for it.  I am not planning on an epidural.

SKIN TO SKIN Please place my baby directly on my abdomen – skin to skin immediately after birth.  I would like an hour with my baby, undisturbed to bond and breastfeed.

I like this birth plan, because it will take a nurse or doctor about 1 minute to read, as it’s simple and straight forward.  And because there aren’t lots of extra details about how I want to handle every phase of labor, it might actually be followed.

Now that I’ve really started talking about birth plans, I realized that I also really need to be thinking about childcare.  I already know I’m going to have to hire a nanny – an expense that is going drastically change my spending habits, but one I can’t avoid.  I’ve decided to go with care.com to find my nanny, and have ordered books on how to hire a nanny and how to write a good contract, but I’m lost when it comes to deciding on salaries and how that works with filing taxes.  I know I’ll have to hire an accountant or payroll service to actually do the work, but when websites quote average salaries, are they talking pre-tax or post?  I have no idea!  This would be SO much easier if I could just take him to the daycare that I can see from my back porch.