Worst Vacation Ever

That title might be a slight exaggeration, as my entire week of vacation didn't suck, but the first half did.  Within hours of getting to my parents' house last Saturday afternoon, I got sick.  I started with a fever, then diarrhea, then more fever, whole body aches, more diarrhea, and then vomiting and more fever.  I can't remember when I last felt so bad, and most of the first few days were a blur. On Tuesday morning, I did something I've never done before - I went to the ER.  Luckily it wasn't too terribly busy, so I was back in room with an IV and nausea meds within an hour.  I got two liters of fluid, some more nausea medications and was sent home feeling a little less like I was about to die.

My family watched Finn for me while I felt so awful, of course, but Zachary was still mostly dependent on me, as he had meltdowns whenever I left the room.  Amazingly I only had one day that my milk supply seemed compromised, and that was the day I felt the worst.  I suspect the IV fluids contributed to boosting my supply back.

By Christmas Day I was back to feeling normal, and even joined the family for dinner for the first time all week.  The last few days of vacation were what I had hoped for - time to visit with my sister and her family who I have missed so very much, and the joy of watching our boys play together.

Christmas stockings

I do feel somewhat rested...as rested as a person can feel after a week of sharing a creaky double bed with two boys, that is.  The entire week Zachary was not able to self soothe any time he woke up, which has me worried, but a few minutes ago he woke up crying and put himself right back to sleep, so I'm hoping he's back on track now that we're home.

It's almost the end of December, and I've barely posted any of my 365 project pictures this month.  I'll fix that before the end of the year!  In the meantime, I'm going to go take advantage of my soft (but crowded) bed and and get some sleep.

cousins ready for an expedition

digging in the sand

the best pic I could get of the 3 of us

beach baby

me and my sis

Merry Christmas!

Christmas Eve

This Christmas season has been magical.  Finn loves the lights, the tree, the music, the stories, the movies, and Fergus the Elf on the Shelf (who was moved more than once at 2am when I woke up and realized he wasn't moved yet).  Tonight as I picked him up to put him to bed, he wrapped his arms and legs around me, put his head on my shoulder and let me just hold him.  Then I said, "Merry Christmas, Finnegan" and he pulled his head back and said, "Merry Christmas to you, Mommy, I love you."

Best moment of the day.

We had a good day, but it could have been better and easier. I learned a lot today about how to manage a day like Christmas with a toddler.  Again, it wasn't a bad day, but it felt a lot more difficult than it needed to, if only I'd thought ahead.  I'm going to put it all in this post so I remember it next year.

The very first present he opened was a tool bench from my assistant - he immediately wanted to put it together and play with it.  My dad tried to argue with him, and that quickly led to tears, until I stepped in and told Finn he could play with whatever he wanted.  So Finn played while we opened gifts, and then he opened something else and played, and then he started to get grumpy, as it was now 1.5 hours after he normally eats breakfast and food was no where in sight.  My mom had planned a yummy post-presents breakfast of french toast casserole, eggs and bacon.  Perfect for an adult Christmas morning, but not when there's a toddler involved.  I grabbed him a snack, which he ate while busily working with his tools.  When we finally did eat breakfast, he wasn't really hungry for anything but bacon, but the break from gifts was a welcome one.  After breakfast, my parents kept pressuring him to open presents, and it was driving me crazy.  He was having a wonderful time, and we weren't working on any sort of timeline...I kept asking them them to just stop, but they just wouldn't listen.  He opened his last gift at 2pm, and played with everything, and that was just perfect.

Tool bench

Virginia football!

I then took him for a quiet time drive, and he napped just a little, and then we came home and enjoyed Christmas movies and more playing with his tool bench and his rocket launcher. At one point he came running at me and gave me a huge hug, "I love my rocket, Mommy!  Thank you for getting it for me."  I did remind him that it was from his Aunt Heidi, but I'm still pretty sure I'm getting the credit for this one.  We had a lovely Christmas dinner that (for a change) was early enough for Finn to be happy, and then our sweet, quiet bedtime.

Rocket launcher in action

So here's what I would have done differently, and what I plan to do next year.  First, I'll let him open a few more presents early.  All the gifts that get mailed by friends and family will be opened as they come, and we'll open a couple on Christmas Eve.  Then, on Christmas morning we'll have Santa gifts, followed by serving a breakfast of finger foods that we can eat while opening the rest of the gifts.  If my parents are here, I'll tell them that there is no rush on opening gifts, and that they are not to badger him to open more if he's happily playing with something.  This morning would have been fabulous if we'd had food while we opened gifts and I'd not had to intervene every time my parents tried to get him to open more presents.

I'll also make sure that he naps on Christmas Eve as well.  The drive today was a lesson learned from yesterday, and while all I really wanted was to nap myself, the drive was the only way to get him to have any sleep at all, and it made the rest of the day so much better.

This morning, Finn was disappointed to learn that Santa had come and gone and he didn't see him.  It never occurred to me that Finn would think he was going to see Santa, so next year I'll make sure he really understands.  He did cheer up a little when I told him that Santa had left him presents, and eaten  all his cookies.

What do you mean, Santa is gone?

I wanted to see him.

He left me presents?

I hope you all have had a wonderful holiday season and enjoyed some quality time with those who mean the most to you.  And for those of you still waiting, I hope that next year brings you your own miracles.

Moving - Part 1

Cousins being goofy

My sister and her family live about 30-40 minutes from me - our boys are close, and Finn adores the entire family.  J and I grew up far away from our extended family, and barely know any of our cousins, so we've loved the fact that our boys are growing up together.  It's been such a joy watching them grow up together, watching D mature into his role as big brother/big cousin, and seeing Finn and O become buddies (who have the most infectious giggles you've ever heard when they get each other going).

J has been in a miserable job for years - drastically underpaid compared to her coworkers, but working longer hours than she ever anticipated. (Can you guess where this is heading?)  A few months ago her old boss contacted her and told her that his new company was hiring, was she interested?  She wasn't sure, but went forward with the application process, was offered the job (less hours, much more pay) and accepted it.  Her new job is in Texas.  Over 1000 miles away.

She leaves this week and starts her new job next Monday, and then will be back in mid-November to pick up the rest of the family and move them all.  We'd planned on getting the boys together today for one last trip to the pumpkin patch, but then her oldest came down with a nasty stomach bug, so that plan was cancelled.  We're not going to be able to meet up this week before she leaves...and it's not clear that we'll have time to meet up when she's here for her quick trip next month, either.  Realistically, it may be 1-2 years before we all spend quality time together again as a family.  After seeing them every month (at a minimum) for the past 8 years, I'm really going to miss them.

I'm so happy for her, it's such a great opportunity and really is the best thing for her family. I know it's going to be hard transition for them all, but once they're settled, the extra money and extra time at home are going to make it all worth it. And yet I'm so sad that she's going to be so far away.  I can barely even think about it without crying.

Maybe it's a good thing Finn and I went to the pumpkin patch alone this year - at least there were no tears.

New Year's Resolutions

Stolen from George Takei

New Year's Eve found me somewhere I haven't been in a long time - at a party. Yesterday afternoon, Finn and I loaded up and headed to my sister's house for a slumber party.  Once the boys were in bed, the grandparents were left to hold down the fort, and the rest of us went to one of the neighbor's house for a lovely New Year's Eve party.  I wasn't too sure how long I would last (especially without alcohol to fuel my need to watch the ball drop) but I made it up until midnight, and then even later when J and I went back home and stayed up late talking about our family.

Morning came way too early, but it was an early that started with my little boy snuggled up close to me.  It wasn't long before he heard his cousins downstairs and demanded that we go down to join them.  It was such a joy to see them all interacting.  Finn is just old enough to play with them, and he worships D, his oldest cousin, so much fun was had by all.  It was noisy, either with laughter or shouts or tears, and occasionally maddening, but still so much fun.

I napped with Finn this afternoon, and as I dozed, I thought about the clean slate of the year ahead.  Over the past few months I've made huge steps towards getting my life ready for baby #2, but I've still got a long ways to go.  I know one of the realities of having another child is going to be that I will feel like my life is out of my control at times, and I'm going to have very little free time to myself.  If I'm going to not just survive it, but also manage to enjoy it, I'm going to have to change a lot.

 I've cleaned out the guest bedroom, and started to imagine what it will look like when it becomes Finn's big boy room.  One of the biggest disappointments about this house is that it doesn't give me as much play room as I'd hoped for Finn (though it is much better than my condo).  This weekend I decided that it was time to embrace the clutter, and accept the fact that my house may not look "pretty" for the next few years, but it will be functional.  I rearranged the living room in a way that gives a lot more space for storage of Finn's bigger toys, and gives more room for play as well.  It's not pretty, but it's comfortable.  I've tried to organize all the toys - they've just been thrown into bins in the past, but starting now I'm making a rule that all the pieces of toys, puzzles and games must be kept together, and I'm going to try to find some sort of organization for all the other toys. They toys will be enjoyed much more if they're organized, and the clutter will have some sense of order to it, as well.

I've also bought myself a magnetic weekly calendar.  Each week I have certain things that must be done - I need to spend a certain amount of time on work stuff, I need to do bills once a week, I'd like to read blogs and perhaps write a blog post a few times a week, and starting later this month I'll need to add in time for studying for boards. And then of course there's things like laundry and other household chores. I'm going to put all these tasks on magnets, and each week put them on different days of the week, and try to stick to it.  I decided on magnets so I can easily rearrange if something happens one night and I end up not getting everything done, or decide to do a blog post on my night that I'm supposed to study. It's going to take some experimenting, but I think it might be something that works well for me.

Finally, I'm going to have to start following a budget more strictly.  I've been lax the past few months, but I can't afford that anymore, especially if I end up needing IVF.  I'm going to go back to making lists for my weekly trips to Target, and not buying anything not on the list (a book here, a cute shirt there - it adds up quick!) I'm going to get back to taking my lunch to work most days, too.  I could easily save $250 a month just by doing those changes right there.  After this 2ww is over, and I know what sort of expenses I'm facing in the year ahead, I'll be sitting down to go over my finances and come up with a much more focused plan.

I've never been one to stick to schedules, or be overly organized, but it's time I changed that.  It turns out that life as a single mom is much easier that way!

Thanksgiving Weekend

For the past few days I've been working on a post about the supplements I decided to take to help improve my chances of getting pregnant - supplements that I decided on after a lot of research.  It's taking longer than I thought to write, so I thought I'd take a break and write about our Thanksgiving weekend.

We had Thanksgiving dinner at my my favorite aunt and uncle's house - my Grandmom was there, too, as well as a cousin with her new boyfriend.  Finn was shy at first, but quickly warmed up to everyone and had fun being the center of attention.  It was a wonderful evening of good food and time with some of my favorite family members.  And of course, I only took one picture the entire evening!

Finn's Second Thanksgiving

Friday we met with a friend and her adorable daughter for brunch, and then spent the afternoon with my parents and my grandmom.  My grandmom was one of my heros when I was a little girl. I wanted nothing more than to spend time with her, and we'd make up stories about what my life would be like when I grew up.  She had all sorts of dreams and stories, went hunting for worms to go fishing with, fished every weekend with my granddad, grew her own vegetables, and spent all summer canning and freezing them.  Now she takes 10 minutes to walk from the living room to the bathroom, spends most of her time in her room watching television and usually doesn't get involved in conversations more deep than the last play in the football game. It makes me sad to know that this is one of the last times I'm going to spend with her (and she was the main reason we came down for here this year), and sad that she is no longer to strong woman I once knew.  But it was wonderful to see Finn with her. He grinned at her, he hugged on her and even gave her a few kisses.  She seemed more like the woman I remembered when she interacted with him.

I love Thanksgiving.  I love the time with family and with friends, and the chance to stop for just a moment and reflect not on what is missing in my life, but the blessings I do have in my life.  It's something I don't do often enough - ok, so I think about how lucky I am to have Finn every single day, I will never forget to be thankful for that amazing blessing.  But the other stuff is easy to forget until Thanksgiving comes along.

I am so thankful I managed to get a plane ticket to come down this weekend to spend time with my family.  I'm thankful for the childhood memories my grandmom gave me.  I'm thankful for a delicious meal with my family. I'm thankful for my mom's pecan pie.  I'm thankful for stretchy pants, and a diet that let me lose three pounds last week...three pounds that I'm sure I put back on this weekend.  I'm thankful that today is CD2, and I'm a month closer to my next try for baby #2.

I'm thankful for parents who adore my son, who love spending time with him, and who are smart enough to live somewhere that allows us to spend an afternoon at the beach in November.

Celebrate Good Times

Birthday Boy

Years ago, I attended the birthday party of a two year old whose mama went way overboard.  There were easily 60 people at this party, and the little girl (we'll call her A) had at least 30 presents to open.  I'll never forget the horror on her mom's face when, about 15 presents in, A decided she'd had enough and threw a fit when her mom wouldn't let me read her the book I'd given her.  "Great Shannon, your gift has stopped the entire party."  Two things struck me then.  First was the fact that if I'd had a little girl who was opening tons of toys, and yet it was the book she wanted to read, I'd be over the moon thrilled. The second was, what did this little two year old need such a huge party for?  The years passed, and every year her birthday was celebrated with another over the top celebration.  I can't help but wonder what a disappointment her future birthdays will be, when no one throws her a big party.  Even a few friends taking her out for a lovely dinner will seem like a let down.

At the other extreme are the people whose family have never made a big deal out of any occasion.  InBetween's post last week has the perfect example of what that can lead to - adults who don't think that celebrating special days with and for your loved ones is important.  Not taking the time to let do special things for your loved ones makes life pretty dull.  And can lead to some really hurt feelings.

With my family, I'd like to find a way to fall somewhere in between the two extremes.  I want to celebrate the special days in a way that teaches Finn that it's important to make a big deal out of these moments, and that it's possible to do that without a lot of expensive presents.  (Though a few presents can be a good thing!)  Not to mention that it'll be a lot of fun along the way, and create some good memories for us both.

So, Finn's birthday party was an epic failure as far as that whole "avoid over the extravaganza" plan goes.  There were 18 people there, a lot of presents and a professional photographer (we never got Finn's 6 month pictures taken, so my friend owed me a session).  It was a lot of fun, though.  The kids ran in and out of the house, playing hide and seek and tag, blowing bubbles and writing birthday messages for Finn with chalk on the driveway.  The adults drank beer, ate Mexican food and let the kids run wild.  It's not something I want to do every year, but as a first birthday party, it pretty much rocked.

Outdoor fun

This cake tasted much better than Finn's egg free, wheat free ickiness

Kids Wearing the Party Favors

Ollie's sad face (because he couldn't open presents, too)

Finn and Lillian

I've always wanted a party with balloons on the mailbox

We're not going to have a party like this every year.  And besides, I want Finn to learn to want to celebrate the special days for the ones he loves, too, not just his own special days.  Some things will be easy.  Like starting the tradition of the birthday flag.  Everyone (me, Finn, Nanny M, future sibling) will get the birthday flag flown for their birthday week.  When he's older, we'll even fly the birthday flag for other family and friends if he decides it's a good idea.

Other things will be harder - it seems a little weird to be the one to make my birthday or Mother's Day a big deal.  It would be easier with a husband to do these things, but without one, I'm not exactly sure what to do, aside from giving Nanny M some money to take Finn shopping and let him pick out a gift for me.

What traditions does your family have (or do you hope to have) that you love?  How are you celebrating the big days with your kids?  Oh, and what other days have you found to make a celebration out of that aren't the obvious?

St. Patrick's Day

You might have suspected I'd have a shirt for Finn to wear for St. Patrick's Day.  One or two of you might even be surprised that I managed to avoid dressing him up as a leprechaun.  I'm actually pretty amazed that I only bought him one shirt!

Look at the rolls on his thighs!

Five years ago on St. Patrick's Day my nephew D was born.  I really can't believe that it's been 5 years already, but he is, and he's turned into such a great little boy.  We had a family party yesterday, and today was the big party at the fire station.  It was so much fun, complete with pizza, cake and a tour of the fire house.  The kids got to climb all over a fire truck and ambulance, and one of the guys suited up in full gear, while the kids watched.  They made a big point of wanting the kids to see what he looked like before, during and after getting suited up, so if they were unlucky enough to be in a fire one day, they'd recognize that the fire fighter was a good guy coming to help them.

D behind the wheel of the fire truck

Notice the themed shirt for the party

Watching the fire fighter

I love the reflection in the hubcap on this shot

Learning to Parent

My sister and her family left this morning.  It's amazing how quiet the house is with them gone.  Finn loved spending time with his cousins, though I think the constant stimulation, attention and recurrent close brushes with severe injury has worn him out.  He slept for 12 hours last night, and has already taken an almost 2 hour nap this morning!

It's interesting watching my parents with the boys...my sister and I have gained a lot of insight into how we were raised since the boys have come into our lives.  My mom adores her grandsons, but on her terms.  She will never be the grandmom that plays with her grandkids for hours.  Instead, she'll be the one that smothers them with attention as long as it doesn't interfere with her schedule too much.  The day after Christmas, we watched her sit on the couch, reading the paper while the boys played on the floor in front of her and tried to get her to play with them - she didn't even respond.  My dad is much more involved with the children, and they adore him, but he really has no idea how to handle discipline issues or a fussy baby.  I'm pretty sure that his grandparenting style is fairly similar to his parenting style, and while I don't remember clearly, I think my mom's may be the same as well.

My sister has the reputation as being the difficult child.  She cried all the time from the time she was an older infant on into her early school years.  She never seemed like she felt settled or secure until she was well into elementary school.  Flash forward a few decades to when D was around 2. J told our mom she didn't want to go shopping at the time our mom wanted to go, because it would interfere with D's nap.  My mom's response, "He'll be fine, he needs to learn to to be flexible," and later Mom complained to me about how J let herself be controlled by D's needs.  I told her that J knew that D didn't do well if he didn't nap and eat his meals on a regular schedule, and my mom actually snorted at me in response.

Later J and I talked about it, and came to the conclusion that all of J's crying as a child was probably related to her need for a schedule, and the fact that my parents didn't give it to her.  Based on her experiences when D didn't follow his usual schedule, we're pretty sure that he would have been just as bad as she had been, if J hadn't been an observant parent and responded to her son's needs appropriately.

My parents did do the most important thing right: I always felt loved as a child, and I feel loved by my parents as an adult child.  But I don't feel as though they were as involved in my life as they could have been or should have been.  My mom was a stay at home mom until I was in 1st grade, but my memories as a child that age center around me playing alone either with my record player in my room or out on my swing set.  I remember running errands with my mom, but I don't ever remember playing with her.  I don't remember her helping me with school work or reading with me once I could read on my own.  I know I never felt comfortable talking to her when I had fights with friends, much less trouble with boys later on.

Even before Finn was born, I knew I wanted to have a different parenting style than my parents.  I've read books, talked to friends and watched other people with their children, and have been gradually putting together something that works for me; I guess the closest thing to a description is "attachment parenting" though I'm not strictly following it by the book.  It's been difficult when my parents are around, because they can't help but criticize the way I parent since it's so different than how they did things.  It's helping that I've already seen some instances where I ignored their comments, and things have worked out fine.  One example is how both my parents constantly told me I needed to put Finn down more often when he was a newborn.  "Don't hold him all the time, he'll get spoiled and never want to be put down at all."  I ignored them, and I now have a baby who is happy to play on the floor by himself, as long as I'm somewhere nearby.  He knows I'm there if he needs me, so he's secure without me constantly holding him.

It also helps, reading scenarios in books that I can directly relate to my own experiences growing up.  In Superbaby, the author recommends avoiding labels with children, instead trying to praise them or thank them (or even describe them) based on their specific actions.  That really jumped out at me, since I remember always being labeled as "shy" and "smart" when I was a child.  That label of being shy really stuck with me, but the truth is, it isn't accurate at all.  I'm not shy, I'm just reserved in new situations.  I like to sit back and get the lay of the land before I jump into anything new.  It's funny, because once I realized that about myself, I found I had a lot more confidence in social situations - and I didn't realize that about myself until just a few years ago.  I wonder if my life would have been different if my parents had realized that about me when I was a kid and described me that way instead of labeling me as shy.  As far as being smart goes - I remember being so proud that I was smart.  Proud, that is, until I got to a math class that was really challenging for me, and instead of working hard to figure it out, I gave up because I figured I wasn't as smart as everyone always thought.  Which is exactly what the author of Superbaby says will happen.  Again, I wonder what would have been different about my life if my parents had praised me for working hard to solve difficult problems, instead of praising me for being the smart one.

We all want to be great parents, but most importantly, we all want to raise great kids.  In the end, I think I turned out alright, so it's clear there's a lot I can learn from my parents.  But in a single parent home, there's not the extra parent to balance out the mistakes, so it's even more important to me that I learn who Finn is and then learn how to be the best mom I can to him.  I think I'm going to expand my use of this space to write about the books and articles I read and how I interpret them to apply to my family.  If anyone has any suggestions for great books, articles or websites, I'd love to hear them!

The First Week

I can’t believe that Finn is a week old already!  We’ve been home since Sunday, and slowly settling into a routine.  Before he was born, I noticed he was most active between late afternoon and sometime in the middle of the night – and that continues to be true now.  He eats every 2-3 hours from early morning until mid-afternoon, and then he eats every 30-75 minutes, and is fussy in between.  I watched the Happiest Baby on the Block video over the past few days, and that has helped with the fussiness – it even stopped a major meltdown in mid-cry this evening.  Amazing!  As much as the repeated feedings are driving me crazy, I am glad that he’s taken to breast feeding as well as he has.  We don’t have it down perfect, but we’re doing well enough that he’s almost back to his birth weight.

My parents are here, and while traditionally they aren’t the best help, they’ve been trying.  While I was in labor Jamie, Heidi and Alex discussed my parents – specifically my mom – and how she didn’t really help Jamie after either child was born, even though she came and stayed for several weeks each time.  That led to them deciding to make a list of things that caregivers should do for a new mom – they did a list that was generic that Alex is now going to use for all her new moms, and then a separate list that was just specific to me and things I’ll need.  I was a little worried that my parents would be offended by it, but instead they’ve really done much more to help since they got the list, usually without me even asking.  It has made things so much better, especially since I’m restricted to going up and down the stairs just one time a day.  So right now my mom comes up when she hears us up around 9-10, and brings me breakfast.  Once Finn has eaten too, she takes him downstairs and I sleep another hour or two until he needs to eat again.  After he’s fed, I shower, and go downstairs and spend the day down there, until around 8pm.  It’s then that I really feel the need for some space, and when I’m most likely to be emotional, so I learned very quickly to go up before I hit my own meltdown point.

The crazy thing is, as soon as I find a routine that really works, Finn will change and we’ll have to start all over again!  At least I’ll know him better by then – half the challenge this first week has just been getting to know him. 

Christmas Eve

My Christmas Eve post could probably read exactly like Tiara’s post today. Instead of feeling sad that I’m still alone and childless for yet another Christmas, I’m writing this with Vagus draped across my belly as Chiquitito kicks me (and probably the cat, too). I still can’t believe that this is my life.

Christmas this year is at my sister’s house. Right now she has her parents-in-law staying with her, along with her sister-in-law and her husband with their 15 month old daughter Ella, so my parents are staying with me. Being with family who are all happy for me, and surrounded by children crazy with excitement is a perfect way to spend Christmas. I had a wonderful evening, even when my sister’s father-in-law asked me if the donor sperm was just a ruse, and if I was instead really pregnant with Tiger Woods' love child!  Never a dull moment with my extended family, that's for sure.

Merry Christmas to you all!

The Fifth Day of Thankful

I did a little Black Friday shopping today. But not on purpose. I had planned to meet LB and her two kids at a lighting store this morning, to help me pick out a chandelier for my dining room, and new light fixtures for my kitchen, and then I was going over to my sister’s house when we were done. I ended up spending most of the day with them, instead. It started when they joined me at the store, and Isa ran up to give me a hug and asked, “How’s Mr. Baby doing today?” It ended with J asking me to come home with them so he could sit in my lap and cuddle. In between, we had hamburgers and milkshakes, visited a home improvement store, a sporting goods store and a kitchen store. At that point we thought we were done, until we passed a little children’s boutique with a sign out front that read, “50% off entire store.” LB dragged me inside, where I found a cute giraffe outfit for Chiquitito to wear in about a year and a half, a soft little hat, a few small security blankets and a beautiful handpainted wooden growth chart in blue with jungle animals, all half price. I also found a fireman raincoat and matching umbrella for my nephew D, so I’m now done with his Christmas shopping!

In the midst of all that shopping, we rolled our eyes at the kids and their crazy antics, joked about being pregnant, commiserated over our various extended family woes, and had had more relaxed fun together than we have since LB first told me she was pregnant again. It was a lovely day.

I am so lucky to have the wonderful friends that I do, but today I’m especially thankful for LB and her friendship, and the fact that her children (who I adore) consider me (and Chiquitito) to be part of their family.

The Fourth Day of Thankful

Tonight at dinner we each went around the table to say one thing we were thankful for today.  My dad went first, and said that he was thankful that I was pregnant and that next year there’d be 3 grandsons sitting around the table for Thanksgiving.  I managed not to cry because my brother in law promptly piped up, “Well, now Shannon’s going to have to come up with something new to be thankful for!”  But actually it reminded me of one of the things I’m most thankful right now (besides Chiquitito – but that one is sort of a given).  I’m thankful for a family that is so supportive of me and my decision to become a Single Mom by Choice.  My family has its fair share of problems, but not one single family member has ever said anything but kind and encouraging words about my plans.  And so, when it was my turn, I said just that.  And thanked my family for being so wonderful.  That’s when my 3 year old nephew, D, had to ask, “Aunt Shannon, are you thankful for me?” 

So that means that the Fourth Day of Thankful has me thankful for two things – the support of my family, and my nephew D.  And yes, I bought him that t-shirt!)