Answers to Questions

I've had a few questions in the comments of my recent posts that I thought about answering in the comment section, but then decided they deserved a blog post of their own.  So here they are!

Have you considered adoption?
Absolutely. I always thought I'd adopt, and never considered that I would try to get pregnant twice, much less try to get pregnant with donor egg and donor sperm.  But the reality is that is it HARD to adopt, especially as a single woman who already has one child.  It might be possible, but it would likely take me years and probably cost a bunch more than a DE cycle would.  Foster to adopt is a lot less expensive, of course, but that's not an easy way, either, and I'm just not willing to bring a child into my home and into Finn's life if there's a chance that he or she wouldn't become a permanent part of our family.  And so while I considered it, adoption just isn't right for me.

When are you planning to do your DE cycle?
I'm really excited to get going and would love to start meds next month if I could.  But since I have to travel to Atlanta for the transfer, it makes more sense to aim for a time when work isn't as busy.  Ok, so work is never not busy, but my schedule 4 months out isn't heavily booked yet.  I decided I'd try to have my transfer at the end of May (over Memorial Day weekend) and I've blocked my work schedule for the Friday before and the Tuesday after the long weekend.  Of course, there's always the chance that my lining might not cooperate and I'll have to have it done over another weekend, but I'm planning the best I possibly can!

Are you really sure you're ready to give up on your own eggs?
This is a pretty valid question.  And the quick answer is yes, I'm sure.

I don't really see it as giving up on anything - instead I see it as a chance to finally complete my family.  For the few months before my last IUI I took a lot of supplements (I still have a post about that in my drafts folder that I really need to finish), I followed a very healthy, low carb diet, limited caffeine, had no alcohol, got plenty of sleep and did all the things I possibly could to improve my egg quality. Now that I'm moving on to donor eggs, I'm actually relieved to be able to have a Diet Coke or a glass of wine with dinner without guilt, and eat a doughnut without wondering if I'm sacrificing my chance at having another baby. While I know the donor egg might not work the first time around, or at all, I feel such a sense of relief knowing that I've chosen a path that is much more likely to give me another child.  I completely understand that this is not the choice everyone would make, or that other women might make this choice only after making a lot more efforts with their own eggs first.  And that's ok.  Because this is the right choice for me and for Finn. The further into the process I get, the more sure I am.  That's a pretty great feeling.  This whole trying to conceive thing is hard enough as it is, without adding a bunch of self doubt on top of it.

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Finn had his first ever real haircut today.  He decided to be shy and didn't want to sit in the chair by himself, but he was fine sitting in my lap while the lovely Iesha cut his hair (while we talked about her struggles with PCOS and IF, if you can believe it).  Nanny M has cut his bangs a few times, but his hair is long and fine and just a mess.  Well, it WAS a mess.  Now it's still a little long, but with a few layers making his curls stand out more, and a nice shape to his bangs.  He likes it, too, he kept running his hands through his hair after it was cut. We celebrated at a (new to me) amazingly good Mexican restaurant before naptime where I was sorely tempted by their margarita menu, but I did need to drive us home. Darn it.

Prehaircut

Prehaircut 

Post haircut

His "say cheese" face (which is why I never tell him to say cheese!)

Yes, those are black beans on his face.