Fun Problems

Deborah wrote a post recently in which she talked about her own Fun Problem, defining Fun Problems as: "problems that seem real to the person having them, but that other people wish they had."  With each post I write, I'm aware that a lot the issues that I'm struggling with are the very issues that some of you out there are dreaming of struggling with, instead of dealing with the frustrations of TTC.  So I think the term Fun Problems probably does sum up a lot of what I'm going to be posting about in the next few months, especially as the date for going back to work looms closer and closer.

Right now my Fun Problem is that I'm still struggling with the nanny issue.  The thing is, I don't really want to have a nanny. It makes me nervous to think that there will be only one person in the house with my little boy, and that one person won't be me.  In daycare there would be several people in the infant room, so if one person got overwhelmed, there is always someone else to step in (or to intervene, if needed).  It's also going to be very hard for me to afford a nanny, and I'm not able to pay the salary many of the really good, really experienced nannies require.  Daycare would be so much cheaper.  The problem with daycare is the fact that kids get sick so often in daycare, and I can't possibly miss a day of work (with no warning) every week or two.  I just couldn't do it, so that means I'm stuck with getting a nanny.  But I'm an emotional, anxious mess thinking about the whole nanny thing.  I wish I could find an alternative, but there just doesn't seem to be one.

I'm almost done with my phone interviews of the 8 most promising out of the 77 applicants.  Here's the run down of the first 7 (though probably boring for anyone but me, so feel free to skip this part - it helps me to put it all down in writing):

• Applicant #1 - 24 years old, no formal nanny experience but is the oldest of 6 children, and basically raised her youngest sibling due to her mom's health issues.  Babysits regularly and loves babies.  Very close to her family, active in church.  Lives 10 minutes from here. Pros:  young, motivated, enjoys kids.  Cons:  she's never done this before, and may discover that she really doesn't like being home with an infant all day, or that she has trouble following my child rearing philosophy when it doesn't correspond to hers.
• Applicant #2 - loved her, only she wants $100 more a week than the maximum I can afford.
• Applicant #3 - 55 years old, from Peru, could barely understand her on the phone.  Has great references.  Pros:  could teach Finn Spanish.  Cons:  I couldn't understand her well enough to ask her all my screening questions.  She did admit to being nervous, and said that makes her English worse...
• Applicant #4 - 53 years old, years of experience, but she didn't answer her phone when I called. Emailed me 45 minutes after our interview time asking if she'd gotten the date wrong, turns out she had her ringer off.  The whole conversation was dominated by her sharing stories that, for the most part, had nothing to do with her being a nanny.  Pros: lots of experience, knows she enjoys the job and she likes babies. Cons: when I asked what she would do with my 3 month old baby all day replied, "What I do with any other 3 month old."; clearly didn't even look at her phone while waiting for me to call, since she would have seen a missed call and voice mail from me if she had.
• Applicant #5 - 26 years old, mother of a 2 year old.  Again, no answer when I called her - how weird is that?  I left a message and she called back in 15 minutes, "I'm sorry, I was at the Humane Society and my phone didn't ring, I just saw your voice mail when I left the building."  Ok, she knew I was going to be calling - what was she doing at the Humane Society?  Pros: Experienced nanny (4 years), answered my questions well, willing to hold Finn or carry him in a carrier or wrap all he wants.  Cons: she wasn't available when I called.  Didn't remember anything about my job posting.  She lives 30 minutes away, unless there's traffic (which there always is during rush hour) and then it's more like 45-60 minutes.  What would she do when her son is sick?
• Applicant #6 - the manny.  33 years old.  Experienced with infants as an au pair a few years ago.  Most recent job taking care of a 4 year old girl.  That family is gone for 3 months to Brazil, "and she expects that I'm going to work for her when she gets back, but I can't go 3 months without work."  From Brazil, speaks Portuguese and Spanish, is a swim instructor and loves sports.  Pros:  nice to have a male influence.  Lives 1 mile from my house.  Cons:  not sure how I feel about what he said about his most recent employer.  Will have to explore that further.
• Applicant #7 - 24 years old, married.  She and her husband were foster parents for 2 years as a way to adopt, but have put that on hold and plan to go more conventional adoption route in a few years.  3 years as a full time nanny, ultimately wants to own her own daycare, so is taking classes in early childhood education.  Pros: motivated, loves kids.  Cons:  none obvious after the initial interview!
• Applicant #8 - will be talking to her tomorrow.

I know I'm going to interview applicants #1, 3, 6 and 7 in person.  Over all I liked #1, 6 and 7 enough that I'd like to know more, and while I don't know much about #3, I'd like to see if I can understand her better in person as her references really were good.  I'm not going to interview #4 - I was put off by the fact that she never checked her phone while anticipating my call, and then her style on the phone was another turn off.  I had told #5 I'd like to meet her in person, but now I'm not so sure - she wasn't waiting for my call, either, and then the cons are pretty significant cons.

All this makes me realize - I really need to start playing the lottery.