Remembering My Sense of Humor

Thank you for all the supportive comments and emails after my last post - as you could tell I was feeling so overwhelmed and so tired.  The overwhelmed feeling continues, but this weekend I got a huge amount of paperwork done and checked another huge stressor off my list, so it's getting better. And most importantly, I got a little more sleep.  Not enough, but it's better.

Before having a child, I had idyllic visions of what life with a child would be, and the type of parent I would be. It's humbling to realize that I'm just not capable of being that fabulous mom I dreamed of - not all the time.  And really, no one is - it's actually just a little ridiculous to expect myself to be able to live up to that idealized version of me.  All I can do is try.

To that end, I'm going to continue to work on getting good sleep. And the title of the book that Abby mentioned, Playful Parenting, got me thinking.  I usually have a good sense of humor in dealing with Finn when he's being a terror, but over the past few months I've lost that just about completely.  So I've been working on it.  (And Abby, I'd love to hear your thoughts on the book if you do get the chance to read it!)

My first attempt at restoring humor was unexpected.  Last week Finn woke up when I did, and when I started to get out of bed he got upset.  "Don't get up, Mommy!" While it's sweet he wanted me to stay in bed, I could tell from the sound of his voice that it was the beginning of a horrible morning, because of course I had to get up.  He was going to get really upset and the rest of the morning was just going to get worse.  And then I had a thought.  "I don't want to get up, but I have to poop.  If I don't go to the bathroom now, I'm going to poop in the bed."  It took a minute for that to sink in, and then he said with a sound of pure horror in his voice, "Get up, Mommy!  Go potty!  Don't poopy in the bed!"  And a few minutes later, he joined me in the bathroom, grinning from ear to ear, "Mommy didn't poopy in the bed!  Yay!"  And just like that, the tide turned and our morning was smooth and easy.

There are still a lot of meltdowns and tantrums and typical 2 year old behavior, but with sleep and humor (and a more realistic idea in my mind of what kind of mom I can be), it's a little easier. Now I need to bookmark this post and come back to it the next time I feel like I'm at my wit's end.

This weekend, in between my marathon paperwork sessions, I made some time for Finn and I to go out together with no time line or agenda.  On Saturday we spent 2 hours at a local plantation, which is pretty small but has pigs, chickens, sheep, goats, a cow and a horse.  Finn talked to the chickens, oinked at the pigs, looked at the other animals and ran and played.  I let him guide where we went and how long we stayed, even though that meant covering the same ground over and over again.  It was so nice to have that unrushed time with him, and we both really enjoyed it.

We had more tasks to get done on Sunday, but after his nap we went for a walk. I was hoping to get a few pictures by the tree I'd taken his Halloween pictures at last year, but he realized we were heading towards the playground, and that's all he could focus on.  So we spent some time at the playground, and then I managed to get a few pictures of him in the afternoon sun. I didn't get the pictures I was hoping for, but I did get a few cute shots, and again, we had a lovely afternoon.

No more pictures, Mommy! 

Happy Dance

I really need to make a few hours every weekend for some little activity like these.  Neither were terribly exciting, but just perfect for the two of us.

Several commenters also mentioned the recent mom and kid video that's been floating around Facebook, and someone sent it to me - it truly is wonderful.  If you haven't seen it, watch it now.  You'll be glad you did.


A New Perspective For Moms